Future Preparations?

Someone was asking me today, if I had  everything ready for our baby. I had to say no... don't really have anything ready. Then I thought to myself, do I want to or should I be getting things ready? Would it be good to just prepare and in a way I guess have faith that all will be well and believe we will be needing those things. This might be hard to understand if you haven't been in a situation where you have everything ready and then you have to clean it up without ever needing it. I haven't been sitting around worrying about everything every moment. I have left it in God's hands and mostly keep my focus on one day at a time, but this  did make me question what I should be like as far as preparing for the future in the area of getting things ready for our baby. Lord willing, I have a few months to think about what I should do....praying for direction.  

Parts of two verses just came to my mind...

Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

What this says to me is that I don't need to worry about what I don't have ready ahead of time and also if I do end up having things ready, I don't need to worry about not needing those things. God will take care of us no matter what we face.

Trying to Figure Things Out

 Everything that has been going on over the last few weeks is sinking in. Even though God has been helping me through this, it seemed like I just couldn't think clearly about it all some days and things just all didn't make sense.  I decided to take some time to clear my head of the Dr.'s opinions and other people's assumptions. Always makes things harder when people start telling their own stories and filling the blanks with their own ideas.
 I was just so overwhelmed with all the information I was given, I just couldn't take it all in. From the possibilities that were described to me, I just kept thinking of our other babies that passed away, and just gave up on the thought of the Dr. being wrong. They had always been right about these things before. The way he handed me the platter felt like a death sentence.  Now I started doing more of my own research about what I was told. At first I only looked up cystic fibrosis and the knowledge didn't help me much. So I looked up the ultrasound evidences that could show this. Fetal echogenic bowel is something the Dr. mentioned. This was something he saw on the ultrasound and is convinced there could be some major problems, including cystic fibrosis and down syndrome. ( Given our history he must just think we are hopeless!) I'm not just trying to ignore everything he told me now, but I am beginning to feel as though he is saying way too much too soon from the info he has this far. From what I looked up , I do know these things could be coming, especially given our history. But I really do have to hang on to the thought that this isn't necessarily the way things will be. We go back in a few weeks to see if there are any changes in the ultrasound.
 Only God knows what is really going on at this point. He is more powerful than any gene we may carry!
I don't know what to expect and some days I do wake up with this awful uncertain feeling and I just have to give it to God daily. My thoughts and feelings might be all over the place here sometimes, but God's truth remains the same.
 Even though I don't know what will become of all this either, I have to trust in God rather than people. His will will be done.

Getting Back Up!

I write about faith and trusting God, but I also have to be honest and tell you I go through times where I crash and don't want to go doing what is right by having faith.

 Yesterday was one of those days.   As a church (being with Jesse's family) I think many had the same feelings on Saturday, from different view points. God unites us that was. As Romans 12:15-16 says, Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.  Be of the same mind toward one another.
By the time the day was done, I had mixed thought and feelings about a lot of things and I wasn't sure how to keep looking up and I went to sleep with that feeling. My thoughts went back to our own baby that night as well and on what could be coming.   Didn't think I'd go to church the next day. I prayed for God to wake me up in the morning with fresh hope. 
Wouldn't you know it, that is what he did. Not new hope where I felt better and wanted to go to church, but new hope where I wanted to go on and seek Him in all things giving thanks.
My brother Aaron was preaching and it was on prayer, and having faith. And he himself was trying to understand these things. I think many of us are going through a time where we are trying to figure this out but together we will go on trusting. The message was based on Matthew 21:22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.

My heart starting pounding so hard the moment he started talking and did right through church. These verses are true in a way beyond our understanding very often but we need to remind ourselves our trials are for good, and being a christian doesn't mean we won't go through pain and we will just get whatever we want.

James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

God is working in our lives. We have been going through a lesson on holiness and trials can bring us closer to that , if we allow that instead of bitterness.

Yes, I do hope the dr. is wrong about our baby's condition or do desire healing. But maybe I just need to say where you go Lord there I go and I give myself as a living sacrafice. I will accept your will. I am too weak to continue with that mindset in the slightest, so help me Lord!

 His ways are higher than mine and he sees the bigger picture.

Happy 14th Birthday, James!

You are a big brother and the oldest of the 4  for a reason! Sometimes being the oldest isn't easy. I know because I was too and it comes with responsibility. May God give you the strength and grace to make that responsibility into something good! I pray for you every day! May God be near you in this age and the ages to come. May He fill you with his Spirit and guide you to be the man he wants you to be and to become.

Two verses I would like to share with you right now:

2 Timothy 2:22 “Have no part at all in the wrong things that young men like to do. Believe. Have love. Follow what is right. Live at peace. Do these things along with others who have a clean heart and talk to God.

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

We love you, Jamie!

Trials With Purpose

 God has a plan and a purpose for my life. I can choose to follow His plan and have things all work our for good in some way, (even when I lack understanding of it all)or I can choose to just give up and let things destroy me. I choose His plan rather than my own destruction.  More testing in this will come but his grace will remain sufficient. He wants to use me for His good plan that will go beyond earth. The struggles here really are only a little while. The older you get and the more you see happening around you, the more you realize how short this life really is.  (even though I do still consider myself very young)
 My trials right now are for a reason and I want to use this time to do what God has called me to do through all of my days. Most importantly, that is to have faith and trust in Him. Keep my eyes on the final goal and again go on singing! There are times of laughter and times of weeping... but the song can remain in our hearts in a very special way through all these things.
We were told on Monday our baby may have some serious health issues. (cystic fibrosis and maybe along with other problems that can be associated with it ) Considering our history on top of this news... already having seen 2 of our babies suffer and pass away, I didn't see any reason to think this was going to turn out better than what the doctor was describing and he tends to only give worse case scenarios.  But .... I am able to have peace, in knowing He cares for us and will be my help. (though this prooves to be a new challenge daily)Also only God really knows what is going on . Things might be very different then what Drs. are seeing at this point. Either way though, with His help and by His grace I want my life  to be used to honor Him  and to exhort others.  

Until Then, I Will Go On

There was  a song I sang with friends a while ago that I was reminded of  when I woke up. It was about singing until we reach our final goal, even through our trials and heartache. The last time we sang it, I said to God, Lord keep me singing in that way through whatever may come. I didn't know what would or will all come yet but I did mean that! Over the last few months a lot of things have come up that made it challenging to go on singing. I woke up now with a very heavy heart and honestly I don't really know how to go on. .. but again that song came to my heart, Until then I will go on singing. So I got up read it and now I have to share it with all of  you because I know I'm not the only one that goes through heartache here in this life.... And maybe through my own heartaches I can encourage someone else, instead of letting it  break me down. I will ask that you don't ask me for details of things going on at this time unless I bring it up. Here is the song I'm talking about:




My heart can sing when I pause to remember
A heartache here is but a stepping stone
Along a trail that's winding always upward,
This troubled world is not my final home.


The things of earth will dim and lose their value
If we recall they're borrowed for awhile;
And things of earth that cause the heart to tremble,
Remembered there will only bring a smile.


This weary world with all its toil and struggle
May take its toll of misery and strife;
The soul of man is like a waiting falcon;
When it's released, it's destined for the skies.


But until then my heart will go on singing,
Until then with joy I'll carry on,
Until the day my eyes behold the city,
Until the day God calls me home.

True Woman Conference

 Well, now I'm inspired to do another post on my trip to the True Woman's Conference in Indianapolis, even though this was about half a year ago.  I took in every moment of this trip and definately did not take anything for granted! The night before we left, I was so nervous about leaving the family at home. A lot of it was fear. I prayed that night, that if it was God's will for me to go that He would take my fear away and give me peace about it. I woke up early the next morning so calm and relaxed; not hesitating another moment about going! Only God could have done this in my heart at that point! I drove up with 4 other ladies and actually got to know them!  We became such good friends during this bonding time! They also ended up being my room mates when we got there! I was so comfortable with them and just really enjoyed every moment!



These sisters in the Lord will always have a special place in my life now!


Though I spent most my time with my roomates as we went to the classes and meetings..  We also had the priviledge of visiting with other ladies from church a few times. My friend Margaret was one and I love having her around too! She too is one of those people whom you can just be yourself  with and chat about almost anything.  I share these things because I am very grateful for the people God has brought into my life!

We spent most our time in classes and meetings! Heard a lot of helpful things which I want to keep applying! The prayer meetings is what really stuck with me!

First of all I have to say, Maria got a lot more meat in her sandwich then I did, and I think maybe everyone did! I didn't go look at all the (6000 and some, I think) sanwiches but did see Maria's and I do have one regret! I should have taken some of hers! :) Either way I still liked my lunch. I was very thankful for how the food was all provided. We even got to go to this snack room in the Motel when ever we wanted to eat and they had all kinds of stuff there!

I will end this post with gratitude! I am so thankful for how the Lord worked out every moment and provided everything! In saying so I think it's time to go back to my notes I took there to refresh my memory of what God taught me! There was so much, it was at times overwhelming and I think to keep applying these things is always a challenge!

Colossians 2:6-7

"As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, [so] walk ye in him: . Rooted and built up in him, and stablished in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving."


  Psalm 30:11-12

"Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing; Thou hast loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness; That [my] soul may sing praise to Thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks to Thee forever. "

An Update (finally)

 I see my last post was about my Indianapolis trip. There would have been so much to say about the trip but just never really got the chance to do so here. I will say this, it was amazing! I will add a few pictures now and maybe one day I will share some notes I took while there.

Had a great time with wonderful friends!

ended up winning a basket ful of books!

Nancy Leigh DeMoss , one of the inspiring speakers

Joni Eareckson Toda, was unable to attend as planned because of her cancer treatments, but she left us a very touching video message!

In other news :0 however, I may as well blog this... We are having another baby! My due date is Sept. 20th. My days have been filled with appointments and feeling sick a lot , but it is getting better as far as feeling sick and not keeping food down! I am nervous at times because of problems we ran into in the past, but want to trust in God through this. We don't know the outcome to all these things but He does and takes care of our needs.

Preparing to leave for a few days

http://www.truewoman.com/?id=763

Tomorrow I will be preparing to leave for the True Women Conference in Indianapolis. I have never done anything like this! God opened all the doors to go though and so I trust He will take care of all the details here at home as well as on our trip.

I plan to take lots of notes and pictures while on this journey!

Today, I started getting a cold and beginning of a coughing drama. God has met all out needs this far and I pray He will heal my cold before it is time to leave!

Some Before and Afters of our Kitchen:)

this last one was while we were still working. We still have some things we need to finish up but it will have to wait a while!

Some Renovating Details

This has got to be the busiest summer we have ever had! Even so it has been great! Spare time is seldom and so I don't post things very often here. Time however to catch up on it a little.
Right now the big thing going on around here is big messes! We are doing some much needed renovating. Had a lot of plumbing problems that needed attention and so as we fix some of these things, we are also making more room in the kitchen and bathroomThere are a few messy photos. I will later post before and after pictures. a lot is finished now but we have a long way to go!

Proverbs 31 Woman (I have much to learn)

The Virtuous Wife

10 Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “ Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.

Fill My Cup, Lord

Walking in His Spirit

This week I was working on Doing the signs (American Sign Language) for a song we did in front of the church yesterday. As I practiced I was amazed at the ways we can worship God. It was like a special thing I could do just for Jesus! It really encouraged me. When it came to signing for the first time in front of people like that, I felt nervous and I knew my signing might not be perfect. But I also knew God was okay with that.
I got thinking about how when we walk in the Spirit we can sing with all our might , even if we don't have a beautifully gifted voice. (me) We could sign for God, even if we are not perfect at it. We can kneel to pray right there and then, just because that was the moment God called us to pray. We can shout out the word of God with gladness, for we cannot contain our overflow. If we walk in the Spirit of God, we are able to let go of what people think and just do it for Jesus. Sometimes when my own cup over flows, I let go and share of the overflow.. In these moments, I have no need to think through what I will say... it comes without thought. I often find myself looking back and can't even believe, what I have shared. To be honest, there has been times, where I thought, okay next time I will be more careful. Right now however.. I say God do and say whatever you would like to through me.
Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. Psalm 119:105

When you have a rechargable flashlight, you have to plug it in every so often , to keep it charged. The more you use it the more charging it will need. It's like that with us. The word of God keeps us shinning. The more we keep ourselves charged with his word, the more He is able to use us and our cups will be filled and more! He will take over and give us words and take away all fear of man.

Many times this means we will do things differently than what would be the ideal way to man! Only God can direct my path and give me peace in my journey.

Meek and Quiet Spirit - study

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:1-2

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6


Seeking God and praying he will continue to do a work in me to make me more like Jesus! When I am weak , He is strong! I need His help to continue on homeschooling and to love the way He loved.

Joyful Easter!

Praise God! he created a way for us to have life everlasting! I surrender all to Him! He answers prayers and I believe He is doing something wonderful again right now~

A Few Revelations

Interesting what can all come to my mind when I can’t sleep during the night. Woke up during the night and realized hey, I am now 32! Wouldn’t you know it, suddenly much wiser ! :P
First of all, I had a great revelation almost the minute I woke up. I, in my new found wisdom found out, that I am in need of a pair of slippers and a new comfy (long and soft) night gown for nights like these. If you wish to take this as a hint, you may do so!
Now that the humour has been added back into my life here just a little , I will get to a few other thoughts. What I really got thinking about was how fragile time is. As time goes by, I realize this more and more. It seems to fly by a little quicker each year. I remember very clearly the day I turned 5. Maybe because I was so proud of myself for being a handful years old . Somehow it jumped from a handful to ( 30 makes 6 hands plus 2 more years that is 2 fingers out of 5 so 2/5, 6 2/5 =) 6.4 handfuls. ( think I just thought of a personalized math lesson for my son. Won’t he be pleased! )
Anyway, God spoke to my heart about this very clearly. (not meaning the math lesson) Time doesn’t stand still, and I need to use the time He is giving me here on earth wisely. He wants to give me the grace to be able to do so. Much time as a daughter, wife , mother, teacher sister and a friend I have often wasted. We all have a purpose for being here. I want to continue moving forward as a daughter of the King, striving to do the work He has in store for me, one step at a time. Writing these things down can be a good reminder for when I forget these things and start putting my focus on the sidelines. I know that I can’t say all this without more testing coming up ahead.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. " Jeremiah 29:11-13

Out With the Old, In with the New

This pass year has been a spiritual challenge for me. A battle I will say, with overcoming fears and doubts and working through the challenges that come with teaching. In the midst though are also many encouraging, joyous moments with Jesus and His blessings.

The last few days of 2009 were very tough for me, and I had a hard time looking beyond the hard days. As 2009 turned to 2010 and everyone was saying Happy New Year and counting their blessings I couldn't seem to get enthusiastic about it all. I felt so guilty for my feelings and knew better then to be this way. I wasn't even sure what to pray, so all I could do is ask for God's mercy in this time.

This morning I was reading and looking for some ways to to teach again next week. I came across 2 Corinthians 5:17-19 and it was a good reminder for me.

" Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation. "

2009 is over and so are the struggles of the past. I need to now look at what is today and think on the good God has in store for me. I need to put my focus on the purpose and plans He has for me, and get busy with the work He is asking me to do in 2010.His grace will be sufficient once again. He will never leave us!

Each step I take my Saviour leads me on. Some steps I will be carried right through and some I will have to walk up hill as He leads.

God's Great Gift

                                                             
                                                            God’s Great Gift

We cannot fully comprehend

The unfailing love which God did send

He gave us so much to be thankful for

Our Father, our Saviour and so much more

For a Father to send His Son to earth

A poor a lonely and a humble birth

No room was for Him in this town

Untill only a stable it was they found

There He was born for all of man kind

For all who would seek Him surely would find

The star shone down brightly in the sky

But more to this story as the days go by

Soon many were healed by His gentle touch

He walked among man and taught us much

Those who had died, He was able to raise

Many who followed were greatly amazed

It was on the cross where He died for all

He took on Himself every sin, every fall

He holds out a gift for us to receive

All that is left is for us to believe

By Nancy Wall

God's Family

Sisters in the Lord

Here we are sisters in the Lord

Coming together in one accord

Singing and shouting together in praise

For our Redeemer our voices we raise

A family we are through God’s great love

How precious how pure a love from above

We bow and we worship before our King

We laugh and we cry but still we sing

Jesus our Saviour we will not deny

Coming together to testify

Of all the things which God has done

He made us anew through Jesus His Son

How precious how sweet sisters we are here

How great and wonderful a gift so dear

Singing and praising not one without the other

How grateful we are for our Heavenly Father!

A Calling

I use to write poetry quite often, but looking back on a lot of what I wrote makes me realize how much has changed in my life! A lot of my poems had to do with loosing our first born son and I am glad that I was able to put those memories into words somehow. But most t of my poetry from back then is pretty depressing! By the looks of things almost the only time I felt inspired to write was when I was feeling blue.
God began to really change how I looked at life and I started to see how selfish I am. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean that all selfishnesses has disappeared, but I can say by His Spirit I received new vision and so now I have reason to write poetry that is inspired God. So here is my latest poem...

A Calling

 Time is short with much to do

The fields are waiting and labourers are few

To this field God surely has called me

To do the work so others will see

He sent this calling from above

All of this because of God's great love

To be His servant unworthy so

But to His field I now must go

He prepares me always with all I need

To take some time and plant each seed

He will lead each step of the way

And yield much fruit each given day

All glory and honor goes to my Lord

But for all our labour He gives a reward

And again so unworthy I do feel

Thank you Jesus at your feet I kneel

I trust that you will always be my guide

When I am weak You are by my side

Thank You God for all you've done

For sending down your beloved Son

by: Nancy Wall

Let's try again!

I downloaded a new browser and seem to be able to get into blogger now without problems! So maybe you will see some things going on around here again! (though time only allows so much)

We recently took a fall family picture so I will see how uploading pictures will now work .

(well it looks blurry from my computer)

There are times I am afraid to share with people what God has been doing in my life. Usually what happens is I feel a real stirring in my heart and God takes over . I go up and share whatever is on my heart. By the next day, I feel , oh boy silly me! I shouldn’t have… I better not do that anymore! What was I thinking? Can anyone relate to this? Is that what happens to you or do you just not share at all because you are afraid that is what will happen? Somehow , I don’t think I am the only one like that, help me God , if I am…. No help me anyway God, cause I need it rather I am alone or not!

I want to let the Holy Spirit take over in all areas in my life. Many times the Lord’s will , will be that I stay quiet. His Spirit is able to guard my tongue when I shouldn’t say anything. I think we need many quiet moments! We need to have a listening ear for other people and worship Him even in our thoughts! But there are also times we need to raise our voices in praise for Him . Breathe on me Lord, and cause me to worship deeper and deeper. When You do want me to speak, take over and use me to speak your words through me. And that there Lord I never need to be ashamed of or feel silly the next day!
May God just take over our buildings as we worship together and maybe unexpected things will happen. Maybe the singing will get a even louder and he will be greatly praised! Maybe we will all get out of our comforts zones( ME!) And we will be like these were in the following passages I posted below. That is my desire for myself and it is my desire to continue worshipping the Lord with God’s family! (I am so thankful for all of you!)


Acts 2
Coming of the Holy Spirit

1 When the Day of Pentecost had fully come, they were all with one accord in one place. 2 And suddenly there came a sound from heaven, as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting.
3 Then there appeared to them divided tongues, as of fire, and one sat upon each of them. 4 And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.

5 And there were dwelling in Jerusalem Jews, devout men, from every nation under heaven. 6 And when this sound occurred, the multitude came together, and were confused, because everyone heard them speak in his own language. 7 Then they were all amazed and marveled, saying to one another, “Look, are not all these who speak Galileans? 8 And how is it that we hear, each in our own language in which we were born? 9 Parthians and Medes and Elamites, those dwelling in Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, 10 Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya adjoining Cyrene, visitors from Rome, both Jews and proselytes, 11 Cretans and Arabs—we hear them speaking in our own tongues the wonderful works of God.” 12 So they were all amazed and perplexed, saying to one another, “Whatever could this mean?” 13 Others mocking said, “They are full of new wine.”

14 But Peter, standing up with the eleven, raised his voice and said to them, “Men of Judea and all who dwell in Jerusalem, let this be known to you, and heed my words. 15 For these are not drunk, as you suppose, since it is only the third hour of the day. 16 But this is what was spoken by the prophet Joel:
17 ‘ And it shall come to pass in the last days, says God,
That I will pour out of My Spirit on all flesh;
Your sons and your daughters shall prophesy,
Your young men shall see visions,
Your old men shall dream dreams.
18 And on My menservants and on My maidservants
I will pour out My Spirit in those days;
And they shall prophesy.
19 I will show wonders in heaven above
And signs in the earth beneath:
Blood and fire and vapor of smoke.
20 The sun shall be turned into darkness,
And the moon into blood,
Before the coming of the great and awesome day of the LORD.
21 And it shall come to pass
That whoever calls on the name of the LORD
Shall be saved.

Still Seeking Him

“Your worst days are never so bad that you’re beyond the reach of God’s grace. And your best days are never so good that you’re beyond the need of God’s grace.”
Don’t know if you can put it any better way than that! I need God’s grace everyday of my life.I need God’s grace right now to deal with diappointment. There were a few things I just don’t quite know how to handle as I go through it. I am encouraged this morning that His grace is sufficient. Sometimes it’s just a matter of keeping our eyes on Him instead of other people or things.Also, we need to humble ourselves in order to receive His grace.Our kids have chores and other expectations in our home. Sometimes they may think that what they have to do is too hard. We know that it is good for them to learn from it and good for their character so they don’t get a choice in these little things. When they are all finished they might even see, hey that wasn’t so bad or they may be glad they learned something new.Our struggles are the same way. We may not like going through them, but God already has a bigger picture in mind and He knows what is good for us.After you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace , who has called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm and strengthen, and establish you. 1 Peter 5:10

Where to Turn?

I wanted to share some “thinkings” I had through the night. I was up with kati-Lyn pretty much the whole night because her mouth is full of blisters and she was in a lot of pain. It seems with her in the last year it just goes from one thing to another.
As I was trying to soothe her no matter what I did, it all didn‘t help. I got thinking how even though there isn’t anything I can do, I could never just leave her there crying and go to bed. As a mom we have that compassion for our kids! I have watched our kids suffer quite a lot I would say. The most severe being our 2 boys that passed away, through their time of breathing difficulty. David would turn completely blue and then suddenly take that breath again. Aj was never able to eat at all and was too weak to move. In both cases there wasn’t anything we could do to help, but we could never leave there side! Emily had cast on both her legs all the way to her hips for the first few months of her life and I remember those painful times well. Her legs had been bent to a position she wasn’t born with, before the cast were put on. Then there are all the ear infections and teething. I am not saying all this to complain and I will get to my point here. We as parents can not ignore the suffering of our children, no matter how big or how small. When they hurt we hurt. We always want what is best for them.
So then, how does our Heavenly Father feel through our times of hurt. There are pains we will go through in this life because we do live in a world that has been touched by the devil. Often the suffering here is because of what man has done. Like children suffering because of wars, abuse of little ones and rape, the 9/11, was that not the devils work? Shootings in schools and the list goes on. These are all things that get everyones attention. This is when people start asking, if there is a God why does He allow these things to happen? A good God would prevent this. Isn’t it funny how the world wants to push God out of the way. The world wants to live without any morals, and be free to do whatever makes them feel good for the moment. Rather that be hurting others and God along the way or not. The world does not have time for our creator. Our countries want things like abortion and gay marriages to be legal but then when awful things happen people will say “where is God in this?”
God had the best for us. Even in a fallen world we can live for Him and raise families the way He intended. However, he did not make us as puppets who are forced to do exactly as He says! We are free to choose His will or continue along the road of destruction. If we look around us we can clearly see there is much hatred and sin in this world. But if we look to God, He has a much better way for us and He will guard His angels over us. No as long as we live here we will not get away from the suffering , sickness and pains that has come into this world. If we look to Jesus as our Lord and Savior though, He will walk us through it and eventually take us to a special place he is preparing for us right now! Praise be to God for He is good and will help us get through what the devil destroyed. He does not walk away and ignore our pains! And he is able to fix our messes but he only will when we surrender to His will. He offers His help to each individual, every family, every body of believers, every country and yes the whole world but sadly its been rejected far and wide!

Bible Passages:

We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way (Isaiah Ch 53 verse 6).

The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned. (1 Corinthians Ch 2 verse 14).

Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all men, because all sinned (Roman Ch 5 verse 12).

The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. (Romans Ch 8 verses 6 & 7)

Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.....believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." (John Ch 3 verses 18 & 36

Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. (Matthew Ch 10 verse 28)

Still On The Planet!

My poor old blog has been so abandoned the last few months. I would have had plenty to write about, but just didn't seem to make it here.

We finished our Seeking Him Study. That has been great!

I am now reading through Matthew and it is amazing what is all in there! I actually am going through it with a friend from Saskatchewan. we read the same chapters, take notes and then talk on the phone about it once a week. I really enjoy it~ Thank God for friends like her!

We are no longer going to American Sign Language classes. There were some things going on there that I didn't feel comfortable with. But we are still learning it. I got The baby Einstein , First Signs Video and so now our girls have picked quite a bit of it up, too. It's a lot of fun for everyone!

We are planning to be finished our school work by the end of May and then enjoy the summer doing other stuff. (the great outdoors)I may actually do some painting yet as well.

Well, it's time I begin preparing for another nights sleep. Hubby still on afternoons and will be here in about half an hour.

Goodnight all!

Kati-Lyn

Katie has a way of making us laugh and maybe almost cry sometimes at the same time. She always gets into surprising situations. Example: today while we were doing our school work, she was sitting there playing with her stuffed bunny. (Safely within my view but facing the other way) Suddenly we smelled vicks vaporizer, and wouldn't you know it.... she was rubbing it all over her (sick) bunny:) She looked pretty serious about her bunny's need! Emily began to giggle and couldn't stop when she saw this. We have had many moments like this with her.

Her birthday was February 24th and here is how we spent the day with her:

Her day began with Cherios and a banana. She has quite the appetite!

After letting her have a go at breakfat by herself, it was time for a bath. So she played in the tub for a while and we then moved on to her first real haircut.

This is an outfit we gave her for her birthday. She was pretty happy about getting all dressed up.Ofcourse, she spent time with her babies as well again.This is a daily thing.

Her favourite part of the day (maybe) was blowing out the candles and digging into her cake.

Here is also a picture of her now vaporized bunny. I hope the bunny is feeling all better now!

OH , the memories she will bring!

Emily

Emily was very small to begin with, but with her feet all curled up she looked even smaller. We were told before she was born that she had clubbed feet and so after she was born it was no surprise and yet it was. She was absolutely precious and I was amazed at everything about her! She seemed so perfect!

She would not have been able to walk like that though, so within the first week both her legs were put in cast from hip to toe. The first days were very painful for her and often when she cried, I cried.

In this next picture, only one leg was put in a cast that time. The other one had swollen up to much from the first cast and it was too painful for her to have a cast on it.
These were also bonding times. She learned to hold my hand from baby on and my fingers became an addiction to her. To this day she plays with my fingers when I hold her.

Things went very well and within a few months her feet looked close to normal. Now people who don't know, wouldn't even notice a difference.(a clear answer to prayer)

Emily loves to sing. She could carry a tune about as early as she said her first words. (She was an early talker) She gets a bit shy when she is with other people though. Her and Jamie are alike in many ways.

She is still a bit small for her age, and she has expressed her concern to me, before that she wants to grow up not down. She tries to eat well because she wants to grow bigger. She is very sweet!

Anthony

Anthony was a miracle baby. A baby that proved God is able to do anything and people don't have all the answers.

He was a perfectly healthy, strong, chubby baby. He was also VERY content. Cried next to never, was so easily satisfied... even through his teething stage , he didn't have any problems. (other then some ear infections, but even through those , he was surprisingly calm.

To this day, it isn't hard to make him smile. It's a smile that takes over and he can't stop it if he tries. Most mornings, his smile is the first thing we see, and he is usually the first one to say good morning to everyone. (It's hard to beat him to it!) Here is some proof of that from another source then his mom. :)

Not only can he make some funny faces, he also has a way with words! Have you ever heard of a chicken munk? Well, we had one in our garage for a long time. (That is what he called chipmunks)

I am grateful that God has allowed him into my life!

Jamie

On my last post I talked about how each child is unique. So, I thought I would share a little bit about their uniqueness. I will start from our oldest. So today I will do a special post about Jamie.

First of all he would have an older brother as most of you might know. ( His older brother passed away as a baby) They would be 11 months apart. Though he never met his older brother, he has seen pictures and does sometimes wonder what it would be like. He also had a brother after him that passed away and that he remembers.

When Jamie was about 4 years old, he wanted a cloud for Christmas. this was sometime after he had lost his younger brother.He figured that his brothers in heaven probably get to swing on clouds and he wanted one, too. (unique indeed)It was the sweetest thing! One time when we went to our boys' graves, we left flowers there and Jamie decided he wanted to stay there and wait for God to come pick up the flowers for them. He brought many smiles to our faces and still does!

Jamie was born with a unique heart physically and spiritually.

He might seem quiet sometimes, and can be shy, but actually loves being with people .(very talkative) To him age doesn't matter, he has friends of all ages.

I will also have to say he is not a morning person, rather a night owl, if I allow it. (which isn't often)

He is mature for his age in many ways, and is just a kid that brings love and laughter into our home. He is a very protective big brother and has a very special place in many hearts.

(this was at the hospital with his cousins)

He touches lives in unique ways.